So first of all this past week was spring break and I am SO not ready to come back to school!!!! Today everyone was like "ugh" LOL I spent the majority of my spring break visiting friends in Texas and I had SOOOOOOOOO much fun!!! I mainly went to go visit my very good friend, Tim...but more about him later...
I turned 21 on saturday!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! hahahahaha I had technically celebrated all week in TX *wink* but the actual day of my bday my family and I went out on the boat and docked at a restaurant and ate. Naturally I had my 1st *legal* alcoholic drink and here are the pics to document this momentus occcasion:
the waitress checking my id!!!
drinking my 1st drink!! It was a "Blue Crab" (kinda like a Long Island Tea)
Ok...so now about Tim. A brief background: we dated back in 9th grade (haha yeah can't really count that now LOL) and he was definitly my first love. Between then and now (a total span of 7 years) we have been through every range of emotions from loving each other to down right hating each other...but for the past couple of years we have been really good friends. He knows me better than God (ha not really but definitly a close 2nd!!) and who I am today is mainly credited to him. He has taught me so much and has helped me grow immensley. He always has his ways of just knowing things LOL and although it has definitly pissed me off because he is NEVER wrong I have just come to accept it and be grateful for it. Everytime I have screwed up in my life he has been there to help pick of the pieces and put me back together.
---->Oh yeah...FYI he's in TX now while I'm here in FL<---
So this past summer we were talking alot and I was definitly falling for him again and I sensed he was too, but he said he can't handle the distance so that was that. Feelings pushed aside..move on with life.
Well during spring break I was with him ALL the time....and things definitly changed between us. He knew it and so did I but when I came home on Friday we refused to talk about it LOL kinda like the big elephant in the room when we talked :-\ my heart was aching for him as soon as I got home to Florida. I missed waking up in the morning and him being there...and I missed just being with him in general. We're so comfortable with each other and we just UNDERSTAND one another.
So finally on Saturday night i couldn't stand it anymore and I asked him what was going on between us...surprisingly he opened up and was honest with me about everything! He has NEVER been this open with me before....always the type of person where he guards his heart and doesn't really show people how he really feels. I felt like it was a huge breakthrough with him....I knew that he always trusted me but now he really showed it.
It's really complicated between us...it's hard to explain because alot of it is something only he and I will ever be able to understand. We're not together but just seeing where this goes. He is torn about this and so am I. I'll be graduating this December and you better believe I'll move to be close to him. I'm wanting to move anyway...it's all a matter of geography after that.
So bottom line: I'm rapidly falling in love with him all over again. I have honestly lost the desire to be with any guy and for me that is a HUGE deal lol...i'm normally the type to "keep my options open" if you know what I mean.
For the past few nights we've talked on the phone until 3am....just being silent on the phone with him is fine because I can tell we both cling to the fact that we are there via cell phone. I miss him so much...my heart longs to be with him. It feels so right for us to be together...we don't know exactly why it just does.
I guess we'll see where this goes. It may be complicated but one thing I am sure of: He's worth waiting for
1 comment:
HOpe all works out well for you two girlie! I think that if you have survived all the different emotions with each other (liking and downright hating!)for the past 7? years.. you will be able to get through this... Patience is the key here I guess...
Good luck!
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